Annabel Joseph Mercy (pdf)

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I wanted to punch his fucking lights out. I really did. But he had been a friend to her for
many, many years, and at one time, long ago, we had spoken as friends too.
Good night, Gr�goire, I ground out. Thanks for coming over tonight.
Good night, he replied, equally grudgingly, and then left me alone with his evil, evil idea.
What if I did manage to make her pregnant? The idea both attracted and terrified me in its
simple grace. My mind was reeling in a million different directions. It occurred to me that I
ought to have talked to Gr�goire long ago. Gr�goire, the keeper of all her secrets. Pain and drugs
and violent rape. I thought of words she d told me one time. It s hard to explain, but it makes me
feel safe.
I crossed the room and knelt beside her. Her face was so innocent and guileless in sleep.
Someone, some man had raped her, raped her so badly she d landed in a hospital bed. What had
he done to her? Held her down? Hurt her? Fucked her hard? All the things she liked me from me.
She wanted me to do them, because I wasn t him. Because when I did what I did to her, I cared
about her, I wasn t her rapist. It suddenly occurred to me that that s all I was to her. Her anti-rape
hero, her mental defense against what happened to her. I was the way to make it okay. So what
was so bad about that? What was so bad was that she d never told me.
I remembered how skittish she was when I first followed her. An obsessive fan. He came to
her place. How defensive she d been, how upset that I followed her around. Now, it all became
perfectly clear.
I remembered with crystal clarity when I d said to her, how long have you wanted it? To get
tied up, and beaten, and fucked? She d shaken her head. She wouldn t answer me. Then a few
moments later, she d said, How did you know? And she hadn t meant, how did you know, how
did you know that s what I want? No, I think now she meant, how did you know? How did you
know that s what I need to feel safe again?
I shook her gently with a lump in my throat. Lucy. Lucy, wake up. I shook her harder.
Please wake up. God damn it, please!
She barely responded, turning her head with a sigh, not even coming to consciousness.
Then I stood up, still looking down at her, and slowly unbuckled my belt. I undid my pants,
and took out my cock and stroked it, getting it hard. Then I took off her pants and I slipped inside
her. I fucked her and came inside her twice, down on the couch, still fully dressed. Then I carried
her up to bed and undressed us both, and took her in my arms and came in her once more, and
then, half asleep in the middle of the night, I came inside her once more again.
* * *
It was almost noon the next day before she awakened with a groan. She lurched out of bed
and just managed to get to the bathroom. She vomited, over and over, then collapsed beside the
toilet on the cold tile floor. I lifted her up, brushing her hair from her eyes.
Okay, Lucy, okay. Better?
She shook her head. Nooo...
She heaved again, but nothing came out, just dry, broken heaves as she held onto her head. I
put a wet cloth against her hot forehead.
Go away! She pushed weakly at me.
I got up to get her some water, and returned to hold the glass to her lips. She shook her head.
Drink it!
No.
Yes. I got a little bit past her lips, half of which she spit out when she retched again.
Please, just leave me alone!
No.
She tried to lie down there on the floor, between the toilet and the wall.
No, Lucy, I sighed, pulling her up. Drink some water. A little more.
I want to sleep. Her words were still slurred, her color was still off.
You ve been sleeping for twelve hours, you little fuck. She looked up at me then, at the
tone in my voice. Yes, you re in trouble. I picked her up and carried her back to bed. As soon
as you re healthy enough, I m going to beat you to within an inch of your life. Now drink some
water.
This time, when I held it to her lips, she drank. I looked down at her with cold recrimination.
Where did you get those pills?
I don t know.
I ll beat you right now if you don t tell me. If you don t tell me the fucking truth.
A dancer. I don t know her that well. A friend of Remy s. He s not even in our company. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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